I know I’m preaching to the Choir here…

But let’s get this straight once and for all.

Feeding a child a hamburger is not child abuse!

Having a child who is fat also does not indicate any abuse in the family.

More behind the cut, trigger warnings: foul language and frank discussion of child abuse.

I am so fucking sick of this shit.  Kids who have no history or evidence of real abuse are being taken away from their very loving families just because they are fat and CPS (Child Protective Services) have decided they must be abused!  Where the hell was CPS when I was really being abused (and was stick thin because my parents were starving me as well as beating me almost daily)?

We are told the “system” is so overloaded with child abuse cases, there just isn’t enough money in the world to protect all the children.

Then why the HELL are we fucking around with shit that’s not even abuse?  Why are governments waisting precious resources that could be used to get children who are really being abused out of their houses and to safety on this shit?

Real abuse includes, but is not limited to:  being beat every day, being deprived of food and/or sleep, being burned and cut and kicked and beat and…

Yeah, this new “commercial” the ad agency in Australia came up with has pressed all sorts of buttons, can you tell?

I was severely abused as a child, and it wasn’t because on (rare) occasion, my parents let me eat a hamburger.  It’s because they starved me, and beat me, and eventually tried to strangle me to death (obviously it didn’t work) and finally kicked me out of their house (the best thing they ever did for me).  I would go to school with my back and butt covered in bruises, with bruises on top of bruises.  I would go to bed starving because of the very little I was allowed to eat, and wake up even more hungry in the morning.  I wasn’t allowed to have friends (because I’d tell what was going on in the house then, of course), and had a daily list of chores that kept me busy from the time I got home from school until after dinner, and then I’d have to do homework.  Of course there wasn’t any time for friends with that kind of schedule.  I was denied doctor care because the parents didn’t want the doctors to see all the bruises.

I was suffering from malnutrition due to how little they fed me.  I have some health concerns now, at 43 (almost 44) due to the way the parents abused me as a kid.

THAT’S real child abuse.

Not giving a kid a burger and fries.  Not allowing a kid to drink a milkshake!

Let me tell you something, you stupid pricks at the ad agency who thinks this is such an edgy commercial:  It’s NOT!  Get a clue.  You want to take on a social issue?  Then take on real, bona fide CHILD ABUSE!  You know, the shit that will actually make it so a child will DIE if there’s no intervention.  Lobby for action to use the limited resources all governments have to identify REAL child abuse and save those children.  Leave the children who are in loving homes alone!

Cuz, honestly, you’re just pissing people off, and I’m pretty sure that’s not really your intent with this.  After all, people who are pissed off won’t buy from the people who are actually paying you money to advertise them.

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10 Responses

  1. You know what? The two kids I knew were being abused that I knew in school were both quite thin. Part of it was genetic, because once their abusive stepfather was out of the house, they didn’t exactly get fat. Part of it, though, was the fact that their stepfather carefully controlled how much food they were allowed.

    He didn’t actually specifically try to kill either one, and the majority of the abuse was psychological, but both sustained severe physical injury at some point along the way. The boy’s arm was broken when he tried to stop his stepfather spanking him with a broom handle, and the girl had to go to the hospital when the stepfather threw a garden trowel at her leg.

    By contrast, both my brothers were fat boys, but nobody could have been in a more loving, nurturing home. We had regular access to nutritious food. Our home was filled with books and toys and music and art. Family outings usually included museums, and often concerts and plays. We spent a lot of time in active pursuits such as biking, swimming lessons, hikes with Boy and Girl Scout troops we were in. Our parents rarely raised their voices to us, let alone lifted a finger at us. We had reasonable chores, and were encouraged in our individual interests. What’s more, our parents regularly talked to us about what was going on in our lives, the books we were reading, the school projects we were working on, the friends we spent time with… whatever was going on in our lives. Our friends spent so much time at our house that Mom started joking she had a dozen children she was raising! There was always room at our table for one more. She and Dad always had an ear for our friends as well as us.

    Yeah, I think I know which children were abused.

  2. I’m so sorry to hear what happened to you. You’re right on, of course. I couldn’t agree more.

    One other thing that stuck out to me in your post was this:

    We are told the “system” is so overloaded with child abuse cases, there just isn’t enough money in the world to protect all the children.

    Is it just me or does the idea that protecting children is so ~expensive~ sound creepy in itself?? To me that’s just incomprehensible. I know how the “system” works and that people need to be paid etc., but I would think that since protecting children is kinda the most important thing ever (alongside reducing famine and providing medical care), if it’s currently not possible to do that properly, then clearly everything else should be put on hold until the problem’s been solved! I’d rather have undereducated children running about than abused ones, honestly.

    But then, I feel the same way about pollution. The idea that reducing it is only an *option* that has to be *considered* and worked on *gradually* seems absurd to me. IMHO those things are emergencies and anyone in a position of power should drop whatever they’re doing until they’ve been resolved.

    I can’t stand the thought that so much as a single child out there is suffering unnessecarily. At all. How anyone can know that and concentrate on childhood obesity instead is beyond me.

  3. This irritates the crap out of me as well, not only because this ad is being ridiculously juvenile and douchey. But also because the logic that fat kids are being abused is seriously whack.

    My mother is a nurse who’s clinic was shut down because she takes care of the babies who actually ARE being abused and ARE living with addicts and nobody cares about them. The sad truth is, no one does enough for the children who are really being abused because not enough people give a crap. But fatness, that’s something everyone can point to and say “badbadbadbadbadbadbadbadBAD!” and it’s easier to see who’s being “abused” this way. You can’t tell if a kid’s mom is an alcoholic just by looking at him/her but if you see a fat kid? Eating a HAMBURGER?! By GOD! ABUSE!

    This also is irritating because it falls into the “you’re fat BECAUSE you’re abused and are obviously overeating because you’re emotionally starved for love” stereotype. Which I don’t doubt that it happens to some victims of abuse, but it’s so seriously irritating that this is the logicfail so many people engage in and it makes me want to scream. I won’t deny that some fat children sincerely are being abused and may sincerely live in crappy situations, which is what people always seem to think I’m saying whenever I’m saying “fat kid =/= abused kid”. But regardless of thoughts on “health”, anyone who’s ever experienced living in sheer terror of their parents knows that letting your kid eat a handful of cheese curls is nowhere near as emotionally or physically damaging as raising your hand against them. And really, that should be a giant “duh” for everybody else too.

    This reminds me of about a year ago this story coming out about a couple in the UK trying to adopt a child and the adoption agency denying this otherwise seemingly well-balanced and loving family a child because the father was obese. I remember someone posting it on a forum I frequented and all the nasty comments from people saying “well, obesity is an epidemic and the agency doesn’t want to spread it. What’s so wrong about that?” ignoring posts from people who’d grown up in truly terrible situations or had grown up in foster care proclaiming that they’d have preferred to have grown up in loving homes with fat people, rather than in their situations.

    It’s really sad that this is what our bigotry has brought us to. Who will they blame for the world’s ills once they send all the fatties away to starvation camps? Furthermore, what will they assume when the fat gene resurfaces in a child of thin parents? Surely the thin parents couldn’t be teaching their child bad habits, they’re thin! Will we finally learn our lesson then?

  4. Sing it….to the choir AND the idiots.

    I will stop there. I am too tired to swear sufficiently to unload how the bullshit idea of “fat kids = abused kids’ makes me fee.

  5. Ok, so I ‘liked’ the commercial’s Facebook page long enough to tell them how I felt about it. Will be writing something directly to the company soon. This is outrageous.

    I also reported both “Break the Habit” (FB page name of the commercial) and “Precinct Studios” (FB page of the company) as “containing HATE SPEECH” and as “targeting people with a disease (I do) or disability (this too)”.

    It doesn’t mean that FB will do anything about it, but. Gah. I hate people.

  6. […] And besides, to call feeding a child “abuse” when compared to REAL child abuse is just going to hit all my hot buttons. And not only mine. […]

  7. […] about this advert came from somebody who was an abused child – TRIGGER WARNING for the link here. Brilliant, well-written and heartbreaking. More good posts here, here and […]

  8. I too was abused as a kid, both physically and emotionally.

    I got fat at about 11 (at the onset of puberty) and yet I never had a hamburger until I was about 14, because we didn’t have fast food in my country town, and my parents had no money anyway.

    Junk food didn’t make me fat. A mix of genetics and body loathing did.

  9. So sorry to read what happened to you as a child. It’s devastating and stories like yours never get easier to read.

    You are so right that this commercial (and a lot of the support for it) completely erases the true experience of abuse that children suffer every day. If they’d spent the money they spent on making this ad and promoting it on making an awareness campaign to actually protect children from real dangers – well, imagine what could have been achieved. But they didn’t do that, because they’re fatphobic douchebags cashing in on a fatphobic culture. This brings to mind the quote ‘is fat really the worst thing you can be?’ Because in my list of ‘bad things to be’, child abuser is pretty much right up the top but fat doesn’t even get a mention.

  10. That’s sounds just like my childhood. My mom was the starver and my dad the slugger.

    CPS acts out of political motives. They are probably commies.

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