Books and Covers

Yesterday, I took MiL for a hearing test.  She’s been loosing her hearing steadily for a while, and it finally affected her so much that she decided to see if there was something she could do.  As we were checking out, we were behind another older woman/younger (ie, middle age) woman couple checking out.  As obvious as it is that MiL and I are somehow related, it was that obvious about the other two ladies.

We all ended up in the elevator together, and while we were in there, the younger woman complimented MiL and me on our hair.  MiL’s hair is a strawberry blond, mine is an auburn.  I said thank you, MiL just smiled.  By that time the elevator had deposited us on the main floors and we all went our way.  Once we were in the car, MiL started fussing about the younger woman.

See, the younger woman had a buzz cut.  MiL was going on and on about how that woman was probably homosexual and couldn’t she see that we didn’t want any compliments from homosexuals.  I was floored.  What?  She got all that because the woman chose to shave her hair?  Right.

I’ve not been writing in this blog for a while.  I’ve been busy with other things, and learning how to juggle everything I’m doing.  One of the things I’ve been doing is Tai Chi.  The dojo I go to has increased group classes, giving me an extra day to be gone (from two hours of group classes to three), my husband has started taking Kenpo, so I’m often gone with him to his Kenpo classes, and I’ve started taking double private lessons as well.  So, at the dojo, this is working out to 4 hours of classes.  Of course, there’s time spent at home practicing the forms I learned in class as well.

In the last couple of months, I’ve had a handful of posts.  So imagine my surprise when I signed in yesterday and found a bunch of hits for this post I wrote last year, after I’d first started writing.  Of course, with the views, came the trolls. 

You know, trolls are remarkably unimaginative.  They think they are being all funny and new, and they are saying the exact same thing hundreds of other trolls have said (and who’s comments get deleted).  I mean, really, does anybody really think, for one minute, that I’m going to believe that Alton Brown commented on my post (over a year after I posted it) to be a concern troll?  Really?  Yeah, I’m not even a blip on his radar.

But see, here’s where the beginning of this post intersects with the rest of this post.  People read a post, maybe two, and see I am unashamedly fat, and think they know everything about me from that.  They tell me how I’m sweating to type up a post (because you know, all the exercise I’m getting by just typing, my word! it’s such an effort), how terrible my health is, how I’m being such a drain on my family and friends, not to mention the whole world with all the resources I must use up (because, you know, I’m FAT therefor I eat more and am so sick all the time I need to be at the doctor more often and and and and…).

Just by looking at me, you wouldn’t know that I’ve been to see the doctor exactly four times this year.  One was an annual well woman visit, once to be diagnosed with allergies (really, at 42 I develop allergies?  OY), and two time for other things.  Just by looking at me, you wouldn’t know that I’ve been going to a regular exercise program since the beginning of July, working out at least 7 hours a week (between classes, private instruction, and at home practice).  Just by looking at me, you wouldn’t know a whole bunch about me (like I love reading, I am artistic by nature, I am a care-giver for my elderly MiL and provide 90% of her care in a week, that I’m pretty flexible, that I love purple … okay, with as much purple clothing as I wear, you might get that one).

Much like the woman who complimented MiL and me on our hair yesterday, if you jump to conclusions about me because of your close-mindedness, well, your the only one that looses.  After all, MiL couldn’t accept the compliment a very nice woman gave both of us about our hair.  She kept going on and on about how dare that (she assumes) lesbian make any comment on her appearance.  Me?  I had a nice, warm feeling that somebody liked how my hair looks, especially since all I did yesterday was put it up in a pony tail!

Books and covers.  People know the saying about them.  When will they ever learn?


4 Responses

  1. No. I don’t think people will ever learn. Too many people judge a person by their image without really getting to know them. As for those people who think negative things about you, it shows how narrow minded they really are. They should take more time out to read your posts and discover the real you. I know you are a wonderful human being and a great cook of cakes 🙂

    Good post.

  2. After having read one (and browsing a second), does it make me a horrid person if I publicly state my intention to judge ALL further Silver Ravenwolf books by their covers?

    Oh, that isn’t what you meant, is it? ::::holds hand out for ruler smack::::

  3. I love the things you shared with us that we wouldn’t know by just looking at you. Your analogy about books and covers is a great one. You are right, there is so much that we miss when we focus on the stories we make up for people at first glance. I think the way you took the compliment in the elevator shows how at peace you are right now with yourself, and others.

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